Friday, April 4, 2014

Coming out at work

I hold few firm beliefs in my life.  While I think there is a part of me that yearns for a black and white world, I also thrive in the gray.  Here is one firm belief I have:  Your sexual preference has NO bearing on how well a person can do a given job.

So with that firm belief I never really felt it necessary to "come out" at work.  What am I coming out about exactly?  How does that affect my job?  Even before entering the world of poly I never really spoke about my sexual preferences at work.  Did you?  Do you?  Do you have co-workers that do??  I once had a co-worker tell me about a "wet dream" she was having about our Vice President.  I couldn't look him in the face for at least 3 months without thinking about him bending her over ya da ya da and it wasn't even my fantasy.

I had formed a friendship with a co-worker who ended up leaving the company on bad terms and forced me into a position of doing my job or protecting him.  I did my job.  He threatened to tell our bosses that I was a bi-sexual in a poly-fi triad.

Since, I like to address things head on I beat him to the punch. I called my immediate person of contact and explained to her basically what I said above. She was really the easy one to tell.  Closer to my age.  Female. (No offense to the men, but something about telling them my sexual preferences seemed even weirder to me) Can you guess the reaction?  The owner of the company, her father, called me and told me that my work has always been spot on and that my sexual preference has absolutely no ability to do my job.  The Vice President echoed the same thing.

I am no longer working, but not because of that company, just my health.  I was fortunate to have their support and wish for everyone else it was the same.  Whether triad or not.

In other nice being out at work news, my husband started a new job last August.  He heard of and got the job through a social circle in which people already knew of his marital status.  It's progress folks.  It may be small and there may be a super long way to go, but it is progress.



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